This morning I sat in a clinician’s waiting room and heard the staff incredulously chatter about news reports of a change in the Astrological Chart and the shift of dates associated with each sign. An hour earlier, I too had a similar reaction – I thought, ‘say it isn’t so’ when Meredith Viera nonchalantly delivered the news before cutting to a commercial. As I gulped down my last swig of coffee, I moved from disbelief to outrage and defiantly thought - ” bull-crap, I am an Aquarian and I am not changing”.
Back to the waiting room – As the young woman broke the news to the unsuspecting group, I heard many reactions and one woman cried out..”well what are you?” In this moment I shifted to appreciate the fragility of self-identity.
Our constructions of self – our perceived characteristics and personality traits contribute to the continuous loop of self-talk that reinforces the reality of self – our self-image. At an early age many of us are introduced to our astrological sign. With intrigue we peruse the characteristics and personality traits associated with our sign and ‘wear’ them as badges of honor. They describe who I believe myself to be. I am a Water Bearer. I am independent, strong-willed, honest, loving and intelligent. I am a good life partner.
I look for proof of my Aquarian characteristics in my actions and interactions. The nature of reality is such that, what I look for I will find. When I notice these characteristics in my way of being – I make sense of my experience or I justify my actions with confirming self-talk – “yes Stacey – you see, you are an Aquarian”. This reinforcing self-talk solidifies my understanding of self, which is my self-image. As a result I incorporate more of this way of being into my actions and interactions.
When this self-image is called into question it can reverberate through one’s being and leave one wondering what is real and true. “Well WHAT am I”? I don’t associate myself with being a Capricorn. Screwed, patient, modest, ruthlessly practical - are all redeeming qualities, but not characteristics that I would associate with my actions and interactions in this life time! This new image is a space that feels unsure and unstable. How do I move forward in life? What exactly are patient and practical ways of being? I don't think I want to be patient and practical!
With much relief, Meredith returns after the commercial break to explain that Astrologists have been aware of the circumstances contributing to this view for many years and have taken the scientific stance to stick with the ancient formularies. Phew! I am relieved – I can move forward with my day feeling confident and comfortable with my Aquarian way of being :).
PCT APPLICATION
Person-centered relationships appreciate and honor individual self-constructions. Person-centered ways of being foster transparent space; a way of being with one another that holds the aim to understand and appreciate another person’s self-image regardless of how the self-image has been formed. In this space we are best equipped to honor another person’s choices and preferences.
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